Thursday, December 7, 2017

The Middle Way

In recent months there has been a welcome upsurge of women publicizing the ways men they reported to or sought work from abused them, through inappropriate sexual advances, sexual harassment, and sexual assault.Men behaving terribly, and their corporate and cultural environments protecting them for so long. Given this time of openness and refusal to just go along with it, we hope things about men in power can change.

My dad was different, almost diametrically opposite. In his work life, 35 + years at North American Rockwell, his policy was not to travel or be alone with a woman. I don't mean like meeting in a office or walking down the hall, I mean traveling in a car or doing lunch kind of alone.  He said he'd seen it lead to trouble, and he just kept the opportunity for inappropriate association or interaction out of his life the best way he knew how. 

As an example of how he held to this, he was in a car pool with a couple other people. But when the other man in the group moved, rather than continue in the car pool with just the woman, he ended the pool and drove alone every day.

This worked for him, and likely didn't come up often, as the aerospace work environment in the 50's through 70's was made up mostly of men.

Today men and women work together much more frequently. In addition, having a policy today of not being alone with a woman may hamper professional development for them, as they are restricted in professional socialization and mentoring/networking opportunities.

So is there a middle way that avoids the problems of the first or second ways? I think so. Would it be hard for a man or woman in a position of power to do the following:


  • Keep repeating this statement, as a reminder of how power goes off the rails: We have learned by sad experience that it is the nature and disposition of almost all men, as soon as they get a little authority, as they suppose, they will immediately begin to exercise unrighteous dominion.
  • Stop talking about sex to co-workers. Your practices, your attributes, your interests. Just stop.
  • Consider the men and women around you as work partners, not sexual prey.

Perhaps I'm just naive. I have never been strong at one on one networking or professional socialization. I have not really been in positions of power. Perhaps evolutionary and power dynamics make my suggestions a pipe dream. What do you think?

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